Sadness, elation and measles

Last night I went out for dinner and coffee with my good friend Dung, enjoyed a bowl of bun bo nam bo at my regular corner and ended up at a cafe overlooking the lake and the roundabout at Hoan Kiem Lake. Sat there talking for a couple of hours, the moon above unusually beautiful, a greenish, eerie glair to it, and the traffic going as it always does in Hanoi, taking on a life of its own, people out and about, honking, winding, swerving their way through the streets – all the little things that make me fall more and more in love with this city.

Maybe it is because my days here are now literally numbered, (there are 9 to go), that I am seeing Hanoi through these rose tinted, ideal glasses, feeling incredibly nostalgic and sad that I don’t have more time to jump on my bicycle, explore the yet to be discovered nooks and crevices of this town, armed with my very new camera, which I am completely and utterly incompetent at using so far, having been incapacitated two days after I bought it, and still on the recovery.

On the other hand I seem to be in this constant state of elation, since the last week has been jampacked with great moments spent with many of the people that have contributed to my time here being so great. It’s like being granted 3 wishes by a genie in a bottle, and getting them all at once; there’s been pot luck rooftop dinner, a prematurely scheduled going-away party for Ia and I, dim sum lunch turned into dvd-hangover day, turned into impromptu streetfood dinner hopping, and on the horizon is silly swan-on-lake-ride with colleagues followed by bia hoi and karaoke, make-it-yourself-dim-sum-frenzy, and long awaited dates at Love Chocolate Cafe.

What can I say, I’m happy and enjoying it.

Oh, just to try and balance out the perhaps excruciatingly annoying perkyness of this post, I just had a call from my doctor, the dear Dr.Brian. To add injury to insult, my test results show that I not only had dengue fever but also a case of the measles (in April a measles alert circulated to the different NGOs but I guess this one decided to linger on for a while), most likely adding a ‘few weeks’ to my recovery time.

I’m telling you people, by now it’s just getting plain ridiculous this disease business…

When life hands you lemons

…apparently you’ve got dengue.

Just a few days ago my doctor, Dr.Brian (I call him my doctor, for some reason it has a nice ring to it) confirmed that what I had thought was just a mean case of the flu (we’re talking a chip on its shoulder kinda mean), is in fact dengue fever, otherwise lovingly known as break bone fever. Now as far as tropical diseases goes, this is one of the ones that you don’t want (not that malaria is topping your guest list for a dinner party either), since there is no cure for it. What makes it even more delightful is that if you are unlucky enough to contract the same type of dengue one more time, it increases the chances of it developing into dengue hemorrhagic fever, where your body starts bleeding (hemorrhaging).

This is my third day without fever, no body aches or sore throat which the dear doctor says are very good signs. My blood counts are also slowly rising, which they should be. So I’m keeping my fingers crossed I’m over the worst part, meanwhile keeping a low profile, as in not working and in general trying to get as much rest and quiet as possible. Which is a difficult thing to do, when I’ve got deadlines, as well as my impending departure from Hanoi looming over me.

The last two days I’ve been experiencing this constant dizzyness, adding a bit of a surreal touch to how I’m taking in the world. Life rolls by me as if it were an old silent film, everything seems to have been slowed down to a lower pace. And me, I’m in the midst of things, while at the same time standing at a bit of a distance observing it playing its course.
I don’t think I can express just how much I look forward to this strange feel being lifted, and being able to take in the last bit of Hanoi that I’ll be experiencing for a while.

End of Hanoi days

My time in Hanoi is quickly drawing to a close, instilling in me a sense of melancholy, as well as a feeling of gratefulness for all the amazing, bewildering, wondrous, frustrating and plain odd or downright crazy experiences I’ve had during almost four months here. Which in the entire life span of a human being I suppose is but a short, fleeting moment. But spent in Hanoi, and traveling a bit in this intriguing country which is Vietnam, amounts to quite a lot. At least on a personal level, and I guess that is the whole point of this blog, to try and set words to the personal thoughts, feelings and reflections I’ve had whilst being here.

I’ve made some great friends living in Hanoi, which brings a smile to my face as I know that these people will continue to have a place in my life, after I return to my hometown of Copenhagen, Denmark in just about two months. I’ve also had brief encounters, that although being brief somehow contributed something to my life, be it the experience of sharing a great meal together, having a conversation about art over a glass of rice wine or being granted the feeling of making a difference in someone’s life because I spent a few measly hours in their company, listening to accounts of the hardships of their life, realizing how much I have and how little others do.

Hey, when I started this post off with the word melancholy, I was kidding you not…

Presently I’m bedridden, taken out by what is most likely the worst case of flu I’ve experienced in my 30 years of populating this body (inadvertently some of my childhood lessons spent in a Buddhist temple must have rubbed off). I’ve been feeling the leaving-Hanoi-blues for a while now, but I do not necessarily reject the notion that my present state of mind and body is not adding to the tristesse I’m currently feeling.

I’m missing my boyfriend and family like hell at the moment, so I suppose one would not be completely off the mark in revising the old saying: absence, and the flu makes the heart grow fonder…

On a more serious note I am really looking forward to spending time in Thailand with my older sister, whom I’ve never been to Thailand with before. Whilst I’ve been living in Hanoi, life here and now, somehow has had me distracted from the fact that in a mere eighteen days, my sister and I will be meeting our biological dad. It has been a good 29 years since I last saw him, and I’m starting to contemplate how meeting him will pan out.
It was long ago that the last pangs of a teenage rage against him for bailing out on us subsided, and was replaced by a better understanding of his motivations for leaving us. The most prevalent feeling I harbor now is one of reconciliation, and a kind of tenderness, knowing that he is a man well into his years, who did not leave without an ounce of regret or remorse but who has actually been looking for us kids, my older sister, brother and I, and my mum to find out how our lives had turned out way on the other side of the world.
It will be an interesting reunion, one I anticipate will bring with it many tears, perhaps some outbursts of anger, but hopefully most of all closure and in the wake of that, fresh beginnings.

Oh, and I must not neglect to mention that this reconnecting with my father has already brought good with it. At the age of respectively 37, 32 and 30, my siblings and I have been graced with a little brother of only eight years old! For a man of 73, I have to give credit to my dad for keeping sprightly and productive.

In flight

Southern comforts

Banh beó, small coconut and rice cakes topped with roasted, salted sesame seeds

Banh xeo, rice flour crepé with a filling of pork, beansprouts and shrimps

Small rice, egg and prawn cakes

Pho southern style

Pictured above is just a small excerpt of culinary encounters from my field trip to An Giang

Mekong meanderings

River life, An Giang Province

Rice seed production group, CODE II project An Giang Province

Bridge, bike

River view

I recently returned from a field trip to the south in An Giang Province in the Mekong Delta. The province shares a 95 km border with Cambodia, and is crisscrossed by several canals and smaller rivers, among them two tributaries of the Mekong river, Tien Giang and Hau Giang.

The purpose of my trip was to visit small-scale economic enterprises set up by a Care component which was completed in 2006. The groups’ main sources of income include such activities as fish farming, rice seed production and different animal rearing. The region is regularly plagued by seasonal floods which pose a severe obstacle to these groups’ livelihood security, as harvests and other livelihood are greatly affected.

The project seem to have had positive impacts but there is still a long way to go to reach sustainable development and eradicating poverty. I sincerely hope that our partners, the provincial Farmers Union will continue with the work that has been started down there.

In spite of the hardships that these people face everyday, I was struck by their friendliness, optimism and openness, characteristics that seem to pervade my experience of being in Vietnam.

Unlike what other volunteers, interns and expats I have met, have reported, I have not been subjected to aggressive touts, ruthless scam artists or street vendors charging you astronomical foreigner prices.
My images are rather of strangers on buses helping one get the right transfer on, xe om drivers giving you directions although by doing so they lose a potential fare, encounters over a bowl of mien luon leading to invitations to an art exhibition and so forth.

Officially poor?

Muong ethnic minority woman in Vu Lam Village, Hoa Binh province

Member of LARC club

Table LARC office

LARC club member in front of traditional Muong house

Mountains Hoa Binh Province

A friend recently pointed out the conspicuous lack of postings concerning the actual reason why I ended up out here in the first place: my internship with CARE.
So in order to cater to those who may harbor curiosity in this regard here it is, the work posting.

Since my arrival in February I’ve been working on this one assignment, trying to document the impacts that Care’s components have had on the beneficiaries. More specifically if focusing on community-based groups has had any positive effects on the lives of the people we’re working to help out of poverty.

In April and May I conducted field work in Hoa Binh province, visiting Livelihoods and Rights Clubs, interviewing groups and also individual members. The photos above were taken during the first visit, and as it may come across these women and their families live under quite humble conditions.

The LARC club provides trainings on such things as animal rearing and cropping in order to enhance the livelihoods options of the women in the clubs. In addition LARC provides trainings on family- and marriage laws and land rights. In Vietnam land rights are registered in socalled Red Books, this document is vital to prove one’s legal possession over land and is held as collateral by banks when people are given loans.
Traditionally Red Books and thus any land possession have only been in the name of men, and as a result thereof many women have been left in dire straits when their husbands have passed away or left them.
Due to the LARC clubs many women have been able to have their names added to the Red Books, and thus attained more security.

Although CARE’s components have helped improve some of its beneficiaries’ lives, most of them are still struggling to make a significant move out of poverty. One of the factors involved in this is the Vietnamese governments’ complex laws regarding credit schemes. Most credit loans are only applicable to specific groups, thus if you have been declared officially poor you’re allowed to apply for the ‘officially poor’ loan but not for e.g. a loan to set up a small business enterprise.

It’s a paradox; the Vietnamese government has an active poverty reduction policy but the system of the state owned banks are so rigid, that in many cases credit schemes comprise options as well as constraints to the poor population groups.

On a more personal work related note, it’s been a very mixed experience working out here. The LARC team has been amazing in setting up arrangements for the field trips and providing valuable input and feedback. On the complete opposite side of the spectre is my socalled supervisor whom I fairly certain may not notice if I never return to the office. The lack of support and input has been a source of many a frustrated moments of the character where swearing, hairpulling and hizzy fits are familiar ingredients…

It seems as though this is a general trait in Vietnamese work culture; a lack of communication, teamwork and a commonly accepted norm that one takes care of one’s own business and don’t ask to many questions to what other people in your team may be doing. It must be mentioned though that on our floor there is a great team, working on building the capacity of Vietnamese NGOs, so no rule without exception.

At this moment I am down south in An Giang, a province bordering HCMC. Starting tomorrow I’ll be conducting field work with small-scale community enterprise groups.
Fingers are crossed that this exercise may yield some good findings.

Oh, presently there are about 150 wedding guests in the conference room on the floor below my hotel room, all of which are giving it a 100 % trying to appease the karaoke gods – whoever invented ear plugs deserve much praise!

From Chiang Mai with love

Moto driver par excellence and tagalong

Neighborhood hu tieu outlet – Siri in action

Limestone cave Van Long

Dirt road Hoa Lu

Rock formations Van Long nature sanctuary

Southern fare Hu Tieu – noodles decked out with tender slices of pork, crispy shallots, peanuts, cilantro and at the bottom a rich broth beeming with pork flavor

I’ve just made an editorial decision concerning this blog which may or may not please some of you out there (in my delusional mind I imagine that I actually have readers).

It may be an insignificant change going from Danish to English. however it will make it possible for other people than those proficient in my mother tongue, or rather my mother’s acquired tongue through 30 years + as she is in fact a Thai native, to follow whatever whims and fancies the author of said blog may have.

I recently had a visit from Chiang Mai; my lovely friend Siri took some days of from her important job as a Youth Red Cross officer working with victims of armed conflict, to pay a visit to the neighboring country and thus me.

Pickup at Noi Bai airport early morning Thursday 30th of April, (at least early when factoring in that someone had the pleasure the night before of three consecutive dinners, several beers, Vietnamese dessert sua chua nep cam with Hanoi homie Dung – my latest addiction (the dessert not Dung although I treasure her dearly) and topping it all of with Vietnamese vodka shots and childlike dancing to old The Cure songs till 2 am with roommates J & J.

Siri and I naturally needed provisions (my neighborhood hu tieu outlet pictured above satisfied this need in a most pleasing manner) before setting out on our journey to Ninh Binh, a beautiful place 93 km south of Hanoi dotted with nature sanctuaries showcasing rock formations, limestone caves and simply enchanting landscapes.

Ninh Binh was explored on motorbike, Siri as the capable driver and me as the masked avenger on the back. Joined by world traveller Jean-Baptiste and his dear father Louis the trip made for, as my friend Joe would put it, a bloody good time!

30 years old and Hanoi kissed!

35 grader, 3 timers hiking et voila! Cable car antiklimaks

Car pooling yes – boat pooling aha!

Ak ja, efter med selvtilfredshed at have proklameret mine første 2 mdr. veloverstået og en følelse af tilhør i byen måtte den hovmodige naturligvis stå for fald. Den forgangne weekend skulle jeg afsted med en flok venner og bekendte på en 60 km motorcykeltur ud af Hanoi til Chua Huong, Perfume Pagoda, et samlingspunkt for valfartende buddhistiske pilgrimme.

5 motorcykler, 10 mennesker sat stævne ved Hanois operahus, et smut forbi byens mest berømte pho outlet og så ellers afsted i et sus tværs gennem Hanois insisterende morgentrafik, sværme af motorcykler, intimiderende lastbiler og uigennemtrængelige skyer af støv fra byens omfattende konstruktionsarbejde.

På den anden side ventede landskaber med rismarker, Marble Mountains, vandbøfler og den slags idylliske scenerier.
En fornøjelig men også lang, meget varm dag, med såkaldt saddle butt til følge og heldigvis osse middag og kolde øl på en af Hanois berømte (berygtede) bia hoi outlets.

Men inden alt dette skulle finde sted, måtte undertegnede lide den tort at få et Hanoi kiss! Og det endda uden så meget som at have begivet sig ud i trafikken…suk Hanoi slår du op med mig?

Mit Hanoi kiss leveret af et styks umanerligt varm udstødningsrør fra en xe may (motorcykel)

Ha Noi, Hoi An og Hué – og en hulens masse mad

Uuh flotte lanterner i Hoi An

Hoi An marked com binh ran (hvor jeg må tage over da Jens fik dødsangst over omgivelserne, hygiejnen eller mangel på samme)

Banh canh operation, Hoi An

En glad kunde

My Son – Cham ruiner

My Son – Cham ruiner

On the street where I live (eller i hvertfald min gyde), Ba Dinh distrikt, Hanoi

Temple of Literature Hanoi – Professor Haukohl I presume?

Pho Hoi An stil

Pho Hoi An – godkendt!

Første (alt for korte) skønne Ha Noi besøg er nys overstået, manden fra Valdegade var herude i en uge for at se tilværelsen i pho’ens hjemland an.

Tiden var knap så der måtte prioriteres kraftigt; på itinerary stod: spise en masse god mad i Ha Noi, ligeledes i Hoi An og nok uden at det kommer som en stor overraskelse, det samme i Hué. Åh, ja og så indimellem var der vist noget med at se på nogle Cham-ruiner, et citadel og nogle kejsergrave…

Ovenover et lille potpourri fra turen.